I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
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