I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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