Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
