I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Randomize