Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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