We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
the day after is always just damage control
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
its liver damage thursday
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
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