You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Randomize
