Yo dont text me then not text me
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Randomize