I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
