It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Randomize
