I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
im on a boat
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