Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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