I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I made him laugh his dick is mine
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
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