You're so nebulous sometimes
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Randomize