if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
