i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize