you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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