Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
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