Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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