He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Randomize
