Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize