I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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