TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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