Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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