i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Randomize
