I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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