IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize