So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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