careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize