I'm really into asian looking animals
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Randomize