I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
why is half of my head shaved?
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