Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
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