There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize
