I bet he comes in French.
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
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