If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
