If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
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