in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Randomize