I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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