help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
he fucked my hip out of place.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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