The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
