She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
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