South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
