Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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