All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Randomize
