You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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