My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
