I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
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