My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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