My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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