How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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