I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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