just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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